Your Fly Is Down

Is there anything else that makes you feel more under dressed then standing like a deer in head lights being told your fly is down? It's that awkward moment when you realize something is really wrong and you have to fix it...now. But your frozen.

Stage 1: Denial. No it's not down, why would it be down, I would never be that forgetful.
Stage 2: Oh shit
Stage 3: The realization that in fact you are not being lied to, your zipper is gaping open and hopefully just your underwear is showing
Stage 4: The Zip

But how do I zip!? Do I turn around? STAGE 4 EMERGENCY!!! Can I just do it right now in front of you?

Gentlemen, just smile turn around button or zip up and then turn back. Thank the person and continue on like nothing happened (because nothing did happen, you are still in denial that you have been holding a conversation with your fly down) But please turn around to complete Stage 4. Watching someone zip their fly is just uncomfortable. Not because you will see anything but because it just is. I can't give you a reason here and explain why you need to turn around but you need to. Don't go to the bathroom though if its far. You've done enough damage, a stroll to the powder room is just a prolonged show.

Also, thank the person. They are embarrassed for you and probably didn't know how to say it at first. It's the kind of phrase that just comes out abruptly. It's so much harder to say than "there's something in your teeth."

If you are in a group setting though, and notice your friend catching the breeze, try to pull him away. Ask to talk separately then tell him. Or you can whisper it subtley. For example excuse yourself to get a drink and while you do, put your hand on his shoulder, quietly whisper that he needs to fix his pants then walk away.

So gentlemen, double check yourself before you leave the bathroom and before you leave the house. You don't need a breeze and you do need some decency.

-The Young Gentleman

Feel free to share your own embarrassing experiences in the comments.